Chapter 22

Thanks for patience but this was a long chapter to write

The next few minutes were a confusing whirlwind that resulted in Tabby finding herself sitting on the edge of a single bed in a luxurious hotel room a few blocks from the arena. This had been her first taste of what it meant to date the face of the NHL. She’d barely had time to register that he had seemed to accept her news when they were pried apart like a couple of kids making out under the bleachers and she’d been unceremoniously shoved into a taxi and then frog marched into the hotel, given a swipe card and told to ‘wait’.

So she waited, tapping her fingers impatiently on the quilt, staring straight ahead, trying to be neither upset nor offended. After all, he had looked as stricken as she had felt when they’d been unceremoniously torn apart and she’d been able to hear him arguing at the top of his lungs as she’d been bundled down the hallway so she knew he’d been just as surprised as she had. Tabby smiled to herself as she thought of the sound of his voice, desperate and angry, asking why, over and over again, each time louder than the last.

She brought her fingers up to her lips and her smile grew as she thought of the tender, yet earnest kiss they’d shared. For one brief and shining moment, everything had been alright again but now….

Tabby’s heart began to race as she heard the sound of raised voices outside of the room and her gaze focused on the door as she wondered who would come through it. She relaxed marginally when she saw his caramel coloured eyes scan the room before his gaze converged on her.

“For a moment, I wasn’t sure if you would really be here,” he said quietly, closing the door behind him and leaning against it and suddenly the vast bridge between them seemed to be back, although, she thought to herself, at least now she could see him on the other side.

“You do know this is yours, right?” It was more a statement than a question, but it was uppermost in her mind that she be clear on this. “I mean, I’ll take whatever DNA or paternity test or whatever you want but….” He shook his head as he crossed the room to sit beside her on the end of the bed.

“I believe you…I mean, uh…yeah, we’ll probably have to do that but,” he held his hand up to stall her reply as she opened her mouth to argue, “it won’t be me asking for it,” he added, his hand moving forward to cradle her cheek as his gaze searched hers’ as if to see if she understood.

“You mean your…what are they? Like FBI agents or secret service or something?” she asked, thinking of the brisk and efficient way that they had removed her from the arena. Sid’s answering smile was derisive.

“NHL and team security,” he replied with a sigh. “This is exactly why I didn’t tell you who I am. It’s…complicated to be with me.” Tabby felt herself falling into his eyes as all of his insecurities and his obvious concern poured out of those gold flecked orbs, but she reminded herself that though they had both made strides out onto the bridge, there was one, small matter between them.

“And I guess this isn’t going to make it any easier,” she added, smoothing her dress over her bump again. She watched, with a certain amount of trepidation as Sidney slowly reached out and then spread his fingers over her stomach. She stared down at his hand, where it rested gently over hers’ and then she turned her gaze up to meet his.

“No,” he replied simply with a sigh and a slight shake of his head. “No, definitely not, but…,” his voice trailed away and then he just shrugged, “I still intend to be here for you…if you’ll have me.” This was the second time that he’d said that and she badly wanted to ask what he meant by it, but was half afraid of the answer so she kept her lips sealed and waited. He leaned in to kiss her, his lips nearly touching hers’ when the door burst open and the jumped apart like a pair guilty teenagers.

“Sheeee’s baaaack!” Like a herd of buffalo being stampeded off of a cliff, his teammates burst through the door and piled on top of the two of them. Sid looked apologetically over Max’s head at her and she found herself laughing and allowing herself to be drawn into a group bear hug.
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“We’ve got permission to stay over instead of flying to Edmonton tonight,” Jordy announced after each of his friends seemed to get enough of hugging and congratulating them on getting back together. Sid wasn’t sure that was the case, yet, although he was happy to hear that he had some more time to work on it.

“So we’re gonna have a thing,” Max told them, the big shit eating grin on his face bringing on a serious case of nerves in Sid who knew too well just what that grin could portend.

“A thing?” Sid asked, reaching for her hand. He felt her smaller hand slipping into his, warm and soft and he found himself grinning back at Max, but for an entirely different reason.

“Yeah, a party, for you guys getting back together and hopefully you getting your giant head out of your ass,” Jordy gave him that slow smile that wasn’t so much a smile as a threat of bodily harm if he argued the point, which Sid was in no mood to do. “We’re even going to order champagne,” he added, as if it was the cherry on top of the sundae but Sid recognized the undertone and knew that it was more like him saying they understood just how important this was. If only, he thought with a smug smile.

“Thanks guys but uh…,” he turned to look at Tabby who was watching him thoughtfully. With his free hand he reached across both of their bodies to spread his hand protectively over the swell of her stomach. “My baby momma won’t be doing any drinking.”

The sound of jaws dropping was palpable. In that moment of utter stillness, Sid gave Tabby’s hand a gentle but firm squeeze and when he looked up into her face, not only was she glowing but he could see that she was biting down on her bottom lip to stop from laughing too.

“Oh man, Troy is going to killlllll you,” Max crashed into them and Sid and Tabby found themselves lying on their backs on the bed with Max’s arms around them both.

“Thanks for the reminder,” Sid sighed, pushing his friend off as he muttered something under his breath about Max acting like a fag which earned him a sharp look from Tabby and a raspberry from Max. “Besides, I think we probably have a lot to talk about…if you guys don’t mind, I think we’ll skip it.”

“No,” Tabby gripped Sid’s hand more tightly to get his attention and when he looked over at her, the smile on her lips made his heart miss a beat. “It’s nice of you to think of us and…and we’ll be happy to have a drink or two, right?” she asked, the solemn plea in her eyes making him agree with a half hearted nod.

“Woohoo,” Max made a grab for them again but Sid gave him a solid shove which hardly caused the solidly built forward to stumble.

“And maybe I can invite a couple of girlfriends to join us,” Tabby added with a sly grin as Max wrapped his arms around her.

“Double woohoo!” Jordy shouted louder, puppy piling onto the bed and dragging Max and Tabby off the bed and onto the floor with him.
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“So he didn’t run screaming for the hills?” Mel whispered into Tabby’s ear as she and Trina stepped out of the cab and onto the sidewalk where Tabby had been waiting for them, both wearing their best ‘pulling’ gear, which for Mel meant a low cut top that showed off her best assets and for Trina meant a hardly there skirt that showed off hers’.

“Surprisingly, no, or at least not yet,” Tabby linked her arms into her friends and lead them both into the foyer of the Sheraton, which was marble and full of well appointed tourists coming and going.

“Does that mean you still expect him to?” Trina asked, looking worried and the only reply Tabby could give was a shrug.

“I don’t know. I mean, he announced it to all his guys okay, but to be honest, we haven’t had more than two minutes alone since this morning. There always seems to be someone around,” she explained with another shrug which earned her a sort of hug from her friends which really meant that they both sort of leaned into her as they stood in front of the shiny elevator doors. “Which is part of why you guys are here,” Tabby continued in a hushed tone as the doors opened and family which included two sullen looking, bubble gum chewing tweens wearing matching Team Edward shirts. “Not that I’m asking you to pull a train or anything but if you can help to distract the rest of the guys so that we can maybe sneak away…,” she looked at both of her friends, from one to the other, knowing full well that she was wearing a hopeful look on her face.

“Well I’ll be honest, I kinda had my sights set on just one of his teammates,” Trina grinned to herself and there was no doubt with her runway model height and long legs just which one of Sid’s teammates that would be. “But for you babes, I’ll play ball, for a while,” she added with a grin that spoke volumes about just what she planned to do to and have done to her by the second youngest Staal brother.

“Well it’s easy for you to choose,” Mel sighed dramatically, leaning into the chrome interior of the elevator as they stepped into it, and, turning her head slightly to one side, teased her bangs. “I feel like we’re going to a smorgasbord and there are just too many choices.” Tabby had already had in mind, with her friend’s dry wit and quick smile that she would be a perfect match for Max but she knew better than to play cupid, after all, there would be more than one married man in the room.

As the door opened, Tabby felt her heart begin to race again. He was waiting, just outside the doors, just as he’d promised and as soon as the doors opened, his gaze locked with hers’ and she felt her knees get weak all over again. The way he looked at her…into her, made her feel naked and not just physically.

“Damn,” Trina hissed under her breath and no one needed any translation. He was beautiful to look as a Greek sculpture, on you-tube or on TV but in person, he left you breathless.

“Have I told you lately that I fucking hate you?” Mel hissed as she planted a swift kiss on Tabby’s cheek before she let go of her friend and walked forward to offer her hand and introduce herself to him. Tabby watched him turn his gaze to Mel and give her his undivided attention for a moment, watched him smile at whatever she said, which was bound to be something personal and embarrassing, but for once Tabby wasn’t worried about that. All she knew was he was here, real, and the promise in his caramel coloured eyes as he turned them back to her, told her that he was just as eager to have her alone.

But not yet.

Once Trina had also briefly introduced herself before she brushed by him and headed into the full room where, she knew all eyes would be on her statuesque friend, he held his hand out to her and Tabby watched her hand disappear into his. He had such big hands, thick, hard working hands with thick, strong fingers, thick solid wrists and ropey, muscular forearms that lead up to huge guns and round, wide, shoulders.
He didn’t so much take her hand as, once his warm, strong fingers closed around hers’ he pulled her into him, slid his arms around her and pressed his full lips to the top of her head. It had only been a few minutes since they’d last parted but it had felt like an eternity. Now that she had him again, she clung to him, her arms around his waist as she leaned into his broad chest.

"Before someone else tells you,” he whispered into her ear and Tabby felt her entire body stiffen as she raised her eyes to search his face. “Wait, don’t look at me like that,” he smiled that boyish smile of his that was all dimples and teeth and she immediately relaxed. “I was just going to say I had a private investigator looking for you. I didn’t want one of the boys to say something and for you to take it the wrong way.” Was there a wrong way to take that, Tabby wondered as she went up on tip toe to press her lips to his. It was flattering and sweet and she was back to feeling like a spoiled bitch for having thrown such a massive tantrum and running away.
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As if he could sense the storm clouds in her mind, Sidney took her face in his hands as their lips parted and let her see just how grateful he was to have her in his arms. He kept expecting someone to pinch him and tell him he was dreaming, that none of this was real and that she was still gone and yet here she was with her arms around his waist, looking at him with those dramatic dark eyes of hers’ and her bottom lip was trembling as if she was the one with all of the worries.

Which reminded him, as if the slight swell around her middle where it pressed against him wasn’t reminder enough, and as he pressed his lips to her forehead, he told her again. “I’m here. We’ll figure this out.”

“I know it’s a lot to take in,” she began, but he shook his head as he ran his fingers through her dark hair, reaching back to unleash it from the ponytail she’s put it up in at the back of her neck. Running his fingers through her hair seemed to calm her but it calmed him too. It’s was like petting an old family dog, restful, soothing.

“I’m still getting used to the fact that you’re here,” he told her with a half smile, as he pulled her again into his arms to give her a hug that was maybe a little too hard because she let out a little grunt and suddenly he jumped back, reaching for that swell, his hands pausing in mid air above it. “Does it hurt? I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking. I mean, I didn’t mean to….” Her hands were suddenly there, over his, leading his to her stomach and pressing them flat against it.

“It’s fine,” she whispered, her hands still over his, but he no longer needed the encouragement. He was suddenly fascinated by the new and different shape of her body, and he spread his fingers around it and over it and when he looked at her, she had the most beautiful smile…. “I can’t remember her exact words but the OBGYN said that it’s pretty hard to do anything to hurt him from the outside.” Sidney stared down at his hands and then back up at her as he removed them.

“Him?” he asked, searching her gaze. She shrugged and laughed. He’d almost forgotten how he loved the sound of her laughter.

“I don’t actually know that, I just think of it that way,” she explained, and he nodded, reaching up to smooth her hair back from her face where it had fallen as she’d looked down. “Do you…would you prefer a boy?” she asked suddenly and then it was his turn to laugh and shake his head.

“Actually no…I mean not that I’d mind either way but…it might be harder for a boy, you know?” he tried to explain and then wondered just how much she knew about his life, and for how long she had known it. She nodded and made a small sound in her throat that sounded a little like agreement.

“I guess it would be hard to live up to being a national hero,” she said quietly and Sidney felt himself blushing, a slow heat rising from his neck to the tip of his ears.

“I’m not…,” he began to argue it, as he always did, because it was embarrassing and because if you just agreed with a statement like that people would think you believed it and then they’d say things like you had a big ego and that was something he tried to avoid. Not that anyone on the Pens had much of a chance of that happening. If he or anyone else ever showed the slightest inclination towards actually growing an ego, that person was likely to find himself handcuffed, naked, to the nearest lamppost. So instead of arguing he just rolled his eyes and she laughed again, which made him smile. He really had missed her laugh. “I missed you,” he admitted suddenly and her smile faded a little at the corners.

“I missed you so much,” she admitted in turn and offered her lips up to his, but just as he was about to take them in a kiss he was fairly sure would lead to him carrying her into his room, he heard the unmistakable sound of Max clearing his throat in hat annoying way that could only mean one thing. “Yeah, yeah, we’re coming,” he muttered, rolling his eyes again which made her laugh.

“One drink,” she whispered against his mouth, “and then we’ll find somewhere to talk.” Sighing, he nodded and offered his hand instead of his lips and together they followed Max into the party.
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Trina was already well on her way to scooping Jordan’s tonsils out with her tongue and Tabby wasn’t that surprised to find that Mel was making herself the creamy filling in a Brent Johnson and Alex Goligoski sandwich. If Mel could find a married man in a room to flirt outrageously with she would. So not every pair of eyes turned to them when they came into the room but those that did raised their glasses and toasted ‘the happy couple’.

For herself, Tabby felt herself beaming as Sid introduced her to each of his teammates and though she’d already grown to hate complete strangers touching her ‘baby bump’, she kept grinning even as each of them gave her stomach a pat and told her just how much trouble she was getting their captain into. Once they’d made a circuit of the room and Sid had finished the drink that Max had pressed into his hand, he whispered into her ear that he was ready to ‘get out of here’ and so, like a pair of horny teenagers heading for the boiler room, they slipped out of the party and padded down the hall, glancing over their shoulders and giggling like they were truly getting away with something. She’d seen the looks that his friends had given him and she’d seen the furtive winks that they had thought were behind her back. Not that she minded. She was just as eager to get him alone, the memory of digging her nails into his broad shoulders as he’d driven himself balls deep into her had been playing in the back of her mind since that first kiss back at the rink.

And yet, when he closed the door behind them and threw the bolt, she had the distinct impression that the vast bridge was back. They were suddenly standing there, apart, he at the door and she a little further into the room and neither of them seemed eager to make a move to close the distance between them. His hand was still on the lock, like he had a half a mind to unlock it and run, probably screaming for his mama and for her part, Tabby couldn’t stop thinking about the strange new shape that her body had taken and just how unsexy she felt all of a sudden.

What they’d had during the summer had been physical dynamite. They’d barely been able to keep their hands off of each other and yet now, that they were finally alone, neither of them seemed willing to make the first move.

He probably thinks it would be gross to do it to a pregnant chick, Tabby thought as she turned into the room and stared at the two single beds, each with a suitcase at its’ foot, a pair of runners and pair of good shoes next to them. Not that she wasn’t sure that she felt the same, after all, his body was a picture of perfection with his wide shoulders and his sculpted chest that tapered to a perfect ‘v’ just below his perfect six-pack. In comparison she felt like a manatee, shapeless bulging flesh with swollen, aching tits and a strange yearning for egg rolls and barbeque chicken.

She was licking her lips at the thought of biting into a drumstick covered in thick, sweet and tangy barbeque sauce and wishing she’d eaten some of crackers and cheese and garlic coil that had been in the other room when she felt her hair swept off of her neck, replaced by the soft press of his lips. Closing her eyes, Tabby chased away the images of food from her imagination and replaced them with the images she’d used time and again to chase away the loneliness over the last few months; his naked torso, slick with sweat, as he worked on the stairs, water streaming over his short, dark hair as he kissed her in the shower.

For a moment she forgot that she was a little over four months pregnant and leaned back into him, reaching up to curl her fingers around his thick neck. He obviously took this as encouragement and his teeth dug into her skin, making her gasp out loud. His hands slid down over her shoulders, holding her firmly, pulling her hard against him so that any illusion that she had that he didn’t want her or that he wouldn’t find her appealing, was entirely wiped out. There was no mistaking the feel of him pressed against the small of her back, hard and already eager and yet she couldn’t stop herself from reaching back between them and stroking her hand up the hard length of him through his pants, just to be sure.

He moaned into the curve of her neck and pressed himself into her hand. She felt her own lips curl into a smile as she heard him drag in a ragged breath as she gave him a good hard squeeze before letting go and reaching around to dig her fingers into the solid muscle of his ass, pushing him against her as she backed herself into him. He swore under his breath and she giggled as she thought to herself that maybe Trina had been right after all, maybe she was still a little desirable.
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It was like riding a bike, Sidney thought as his hand slid up from her waist, up along her rib cage to the slope of her breast. He knew her body like Braille, knew every curve with his eyes closed and just as it always had from the very first moment, every one of her touches sent his body into flames. She giggled as she ground her ass against his cock and though he’d missed her laugh, now he didn’t want to laugh. He didn’t want to talk. He just wanted to be inside of her and the sooner the better. He wanted every single, solitary fantasy he’d had while they were apart to come true. He tweaked her nipple between his finger and thumb and she squeaked and batted his hand away.

“I’m sorry, did I hurt you?” He spun her around and searched her face but she only grinned back at him, reaching up to brush her fingertips down his cheek before she pressed her lips to his in a brief but searing kiss.

“Yesss,” she hummed against his mouth before drawing back so that he could see that even though the answer was affirmative, it hadn’t changed her mood. “They’re crazy sensitive, you have to just be a little…more tender with those,” she explained, dropping her hand down to grab his and leading it back to her breast. He stared down at his hand where it was splayed across her breast and wondered at it. Maybe he didn’t remember her body quite as well as he thought he did. “Yes, they’re bigger,” she answered his unspoken question and giggled again.

“Can we…I mean should we…I mean, will it hurt or something?” he asked, now that he was actually looking at her body and not just imagining her writhing naked at the end of his dick.

“I told you,” she whispered, nipping at his bottom lip, “you can’t break me.”
With that, she stepped back from him and then reached back and began to undo the zipper at the back of the dress. Before, he might have just enjoyed the show, but something in his head told him that this wasn’t the way to treat the mother of his child. So instead of being a bystander, Sid moved around her and gently brushed her hand away from the zipper and pulled it down himself, revealing her warm, amber skin inch by inch, kissing his way down her back until he was kneeling behind her, pressing his lips to the small of her back.

He heard her sigh as he gently let the dress pool around her feet and turned his attention instead to the backs and insides of her thighs, kissing and nipping at them until his hands slid up underneath her panties and held onto her ass even as he bit down on the swell of it through the soft fabric. These weren’t the kinds of panties she’d worn back at home, when she wore them at all.

“These are…interesting,” he mused, fingering the fabric that covered the entirety of her bottom and, as he encouraged her to slowly turn around, all of her front too.

“Well this is your fault,” she pointed out, pushing the pair of cotton granny panties down to reveal the swell of her stomach. Sidney stared at it, at the way her hands cupped it protectively and suddenly it was very hard to swallow, let alone breathe. He could hear Troy again in his head, telling him to deny it, telling him that this was a trap, to run as far and as fast as he could. Instead, his hands slowly moved up and his fingers spread over it and he looked up at her and felt guilt sitting heavily in his own stomach.

“I haven’t exactly been an angel since…while we were apart,” he began, hearing Dr. Burke in his head telling him that he had to be honest and open with his sexual partners. Not that there was anything to catch now. He was clean as a whistle down there, medically cleared for carnal duty, but still….

“Are you trying to ask if there’s any chance this belongs to someone else?” Tabby started to back away but Sidney scrambled to his feet and engulfed her in his arms before she could get away.

“No,” he insisted. He knew. He’d known from the moment he saw her standing behind the boards and the protective way that Bieksa had hovered behind her. She wasn’t that kind of girl. She was his girl. “I know you wouldn’t lie about something like this,” he added softly, moving her back until she was sitting on the bed and he was sitting beside her, still holding her. “I mean you didn’t know when we, y’know,” he added glancing at her and then away.

“But?” she asked quietly, as if she were waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“There will be people…they’ll say things, hurtful things. They’ll say…they’ll suggest….” He couldn’t bring himself to say it but as he looked down into her eyes he could see that she understood what it was he was trying, badly, to say.

“When I told Kev and Katie…the Bieksa’s, about you and,” her hand dropped to cover her bump before she continued. “They explained about you and how important you are…that you’re like the crown prince of hockey or something,” she added quietly with a half smile that told him that she understood that that wasn’t a good thing. “They told me that I’d be the most hated woman in the whole country,” she smirked as if she liked the idea of taking on the world and the girl he’d come to love, he could picture that. “So I guess I know. I mean, I don’t know…obviously, how bad it’s going to be. I mean, if you still want me that is,” she added even more quietly, her voice fading into silence as she searched his face with her dark eyes.

Sidney brushed her hair back from her face and let himself look at the woman he loved. Still loved. Loved again. Whichever it was, he knew his feelings hadn’t faded, even while they’d been apart and even though there were warning bells in his mind and even though he knew just how bad it was going to be, he also knew there was nothing and no one on this earth that was going to take her away from him again, ever.

So he kissed her, first softly, slowly. He tasted her lips and her tongue and felt her body sway into his, lighting fires wherever her skin brushed his. Then he pressed her down into the bed and laid his body down beside hers’. He ran his fingertips lightly over her skin, from the curve of her neck, down to her collarbone, over the half moon swell of her breast where he stopped to run the pad of his thumb around the stiff nub of her nipple until she moaned and arched her back off of the bed. He ran the flat of his hand down to her stomach and then stopped, letting his lips catch up.

“Hey little guy,” he whispered, his lips lightly brushing her belly button. “I’m the douchebag who knocked up your mom. You’re welcome.” She laughed, making her entire body quake beneath his hands and mouth, encouraging him. “I’m sorry we kind of screwed things up but I’m gonna try and make it up to your mom before you get here so hopefully I’ll be there when you make it out.”

He looked up along the plane of her body to where she had propped herself up on her elbows to watch him and he found her both smiling and crying at the same time.

Wordlessly she reached for him with one hand and he went gratefully into her arms.

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It was neither easy, nor straightforward, but somehow they managed. Their bodies tangled together, urgent, yet patient, eager and careful all at once. Horrified by the idea of hurting her, Sidney had insisted she be on top, even though she’d tried to explain that it didn’t matter how they did it, that what was done was done and he wasn’t going to be bumping the fetus’ head with his cock no matter what position they decided on.

Still, as she slid down the hard, long length of him, she was grateful to be able to look down at his face and to have him looking up at her like she was something beautiful too.

It did feel different, though, she had to admit that. She felt every touch, every stroke more intensely than ever before and when the orgasm came, it erupted like a roman candle inside of her, sending her entire body up into flames. She felt it everywhere, from the tips of her fingers to the tips of her toes and it left her breathless and shaking.

He’d always pleased her, that had never been a problem, but not like this, she thought as she leaned forward, her hands on his shoulders, her hair pooling around him like branches of a willow tree reaching for water. She’d never felt release this quickly or this intensely. Not with him, not with anyone and it took her a minute to catch her breath.

“What was that?” he asked, reaching up to brush a tear from her cheek with the pad of his thumb.

“Amazing,” she sighed happily, sliding her hands down his chest until she felt the hard peaks of his nipples under the palms of her hands. Grinning to herself, she rotated her hands slowly until he began to writhe beneath her and then she began to slowly move over him, raising her hips and lowering them just enough to feel him inside of her. His eyes rolled back in his head and a low moan escaped his full, pink lips.

Moving her hands back up to his shoulders, she pushed down on him, which helped her slide higher, until he was barely still inside of her and then she rotated her hips, teasing him until he groaned and reached for her, but she grabbed his hands and pressed them over her highly sensitive breasts. She gasped when he pinched her nipples but she didn’t ask him to stop this time. Whether it was the endorphins released from her first orgasm or the euphoria of having him again, she wasn’t sure. All she did know was, as she slid down the length of him until she could feel his pelvic bone pressing against her clit, was that she was ridiculously happy.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered as she arched her back, pressing herself down over him harder and so that each stroke of his cock was at a more shallow angle, her arms reaching back to press his thighs to the bed. They felt like rocks beneath her hands, she couldn’t even dig her fingers into them.

“Trina says I’m glowing,” she agreed breathlessly, closing her eyes as he lifted them both up off of the bed, pushing himself up into her hard enough that he tore a gasp from her lungs.

“You are,” he agreed, grabbing her hips and rolling her over onto her back, pinning her beneath him, but still careful to keep himself hovering above her. “You so are,” he whispered against her mouth as he pressed her thighs apart and back, his hands behind her knees, his cock buried deep in her hot, wet pussy. She reached for his tongue with hers’ and felt his twine around her own as they moved together, slowly, as if they’d made a silent agreement to treasure this moment, to make it last.

And yet it seemed her body couldn’t keep that promise. As he took a long stroke, nearly pulling out of her snatch entirely and then slowly, slowly burying himself deeply inside of her, she felt the tingle at the base of her spine, felt her pulse quicken and she knew she was going to cum again. If he sensed it or if the muscles inside of her clutching at him undid him, she didn’t know but he moaned into his mouth and made two, fast hard strokes before shoving himself inside of her hard and fast and with a growl, he buried his head in her neck and she felt his cock pulsing inside of her and suddenly the wave crashed to the beach and she felt herself drowning in it, her entire body clenching and releasing as a primal scream was torn from her throat.

She held him tightly, sobs wracking her entire body as the wave ebbed and left them both slick with sweat, panting and unable to move of their own volition. They held onto each other as if they had just survived going over Niagara Falls and had found themselves alive on the beach. It seemed he had even forgotten about his concern about hurting her, as nearly his entire weight was pressed against her, and she couldn’t remember the last time she had ever felt so safe.

“Are you…is everything okay?” he asked at last, raising himself off of her, but still holding her close. She smiled and nodded and sighed happily as she relaxed against him.

“Perfect,” she mumbled, pressing her cheek to his collarbone, fitting herself neatly beneath his chin. “This is the best I’ve felt in months,” she added, stroking her hand over this hip and down his thigh.

“Me too,” he whispered into her hair, pressing his lips to the top of her head and wrapping his arms around her. “Me too.” Then, just when she thinks he’s dropped off, she feels his lips in her hair again and then his arms squeeze her again. “And everything’s going to be alright. I don’t know how yet but…they will Tabs. I promise.”

She nodded and made a noise she hoped that he wouldtake as her believing him but a little of the glow fades as she thought about all the warnings she’s had and all she knew that they would be facing and she couldn't help but wonder if he would really be able to keep that promise.

Chapter 21

& the moment you've all been anxiously waiting for...drum roll please



“My life is over.” Tabby stares down at the pocket of extra fabric at the front of the jeans she’s trying on and feels tears fill her eyes.

“Well what did you think? You could wear your skinny jeans forever?” Katie muses as she looks up from the magazine she’s reading. For her part, Mel at least covers her mouth to try and hide her giggle.

“Do you know what I was wearing when I first met him?” Tabby sniffs, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand, wishing she’d chosen waterproof mascara that morning. “Daisy Dukes. Do you have any idea what I’d look like in those right now?”

“You’re not really showing,” Mel gets up and tuggs down the loose, slightly flowing tunic top, “and if you have the top down no one knows, see?”

“This screams maternity,” Tabby moans, picking at the hem of the long top.

“Well what you have to ask yourself,” Katie reminds her quietly, “is whether you’re going there to tell him that he’s going to be a daddy or if you’re going there to jump his bones.” A kind of hush falls over the little group as Tabby stares disconcertedly at her reflection.

“I don’t know,” is her honest reply as she turns sideways and smooths the top down over the now more than barely discernable bump.

“She doesn’t have to tell him,” Trina mumbles from behind the ‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting’ Book Mel had picked up for Tabby. She’s been making faces and uncomfortable noises ever since she opened it.

“He has a right to know,” Mel interjects. Tabby sighs. This is the very reason that she hasn’t been able to come to a decision. Her friends are split and every time she thinks about it her stomach rebels and she ends up lying down until the nausea passes.

“He might not want to even see me, let alone talk to me,” Tabby says calmly, reaching for the empire waist dress that she’d first tried on. She takes it and herself back into the changing room. Slipping the top she’s tried on off, she stands in front of the mirror and turns sideways. It had seemed to happen overnight, the expansion of her stomach to where it now looks very much like she’s swallowed a football. It isn’t that she’s regretting her decision, exactly. It’s more like she can’t quite picture herself facing him looking and feeling like this. The problem is, whenever she thinks about him, she thinks about them together and in her current condition she can’t make that picture come clear.

“I never really believed that shit about pregnant women glowing.” Tabby turns to find her friend Trina leaning in the doorway of the change room, “but damn girl, you’ve got that whole maternal goddess thing going on right now.”

“You don’t have to try and make me feel better,” Tabby mumbles, quickly stepping out of the ‘mom jeans’ as she had been calling them and grabbing the dress, she pulls it over her head.

“Hey, would I bullshit you?” Trina grabs the ties on the back of the dress and makes a careful bow. “I mean it. If I was a guy, hell if I even swung a little that way, I’d totally do you.” She tugs the bow to be sure it stays tight and then slides her hands around Tabby’s waist and over her little bump. “And if he did love you, even a little, then I’m telling you girl, he’ll see you like this and he won’t be able to keep his hands off of you.” Tabby’s eyes well up and she shakes her head.

“I’ll be lucky if I don’t throw up on him,” she sighs, turning first one way and then the other in the dress. It ‘s a definite improvement on the ‘mom jeans’ and it doesn’t exactly scream ‘maternity’ but it’s far from shouting ‘sexy’. Maybe it’s a good balance or maybe she’s just tired of thinking.

“You’re supposed to be past that, in the second trimester,” Trina leans her chin onto Tabby’s shoulder. “And if he doesn’t want you, then that’s his loss. You’ll just have to get Bieksa to start a rumor that he’s a raging fag,” she adds with a grin.

________________________________________________________


“Whatcha doin’?” Kris pokes Sidney’s skate with the blade of his stick. Sid drags his attention from the empty arena and turns it towards his friend and teammate.
“What’s that?” he asks, narrowing his eyes in consternation. He hates having his pre-game rituals fucked with.

“Qui es-tu recherché?” Kris asks, looking around at all the empty seats. There are, as there always seem to be in every city they visit, a few reporters, a few company reps from Tim Hortons and other sponsors and a spattering of lucky kids. None of them, however, appear to be what Sid is looking at, or is that for?

“I was just wondering…imagining I guess if she came tonight….”

Tanger raises an eyebrow and then shakes his head, making his hair fall into his eyes. “You don’t think she’ll actually come to a game do you? I mean, if she actually figured out who you really are, do you think she’d just come running to a game after all the lies you fed her?”

“Who are you girls yakking about?” Jordy joins them at the boards, and he too scans the nearly empty arena. “Fuck, I thought there might be some hot chick we were checking out. I shoulda known better.”

“Sid’s hoping Tabby shows,” Max interjects, not even having to be told.

“Personnellement, je pense que tu rêves.” Sid opens his mouth to tell his teammates exactly where they can and should shove it and just exactly how hard, when Kris lets out a long, low whistle and for once, his teammates fall silent.

He feels it like a tickle at the back of his neck and it only takes a brief scan of his friends’ faces to tell him that what he’s feeling is real.

She’s here.

He turns slowly until he’s facing the benches and he forgets to breathe when he sees her standing there at the gate, her gaze searching, waiting for his. It takes him another moment to realize that the Canuck's defenseman is standing guard behind her, with a few other obviously interested on lookers peering out from the corridor that leads to their dressing room.

Part of him wants to dig his skates into the fresh ice, toss his stick and gloves down and fly across it to her but the other part of his brain is screaming ‘caution’ at the top of its’ lungs. ‘You haven’t spoken to her in months’, he reminds himself, ‘and Bieksa looks a whole lot like he’s itching to send you head first through the boards, which can’t bode well’ he adds silently as he puts his head down and glides slowly towards her.

The problem is he can already taste her lips, he can already feel the long, dark silky strands of her hair sliding through his fingers. He’s not even to centre ice and he’s sure he can smell the clean lavender soap scent of her skin. His heart is pumping hard, like he’s been doing wind sprints and the truth is he’s hardly made two laps of the ice, hasn’t even broken a sweat and yet he can feel the cold clammy trickle of sweat dripping down from beneath his helmet. This is what she does to him. She unnerves him, unmans him, and that should matter, but somehow it doesn’t. He knows as approaches the boards that he’d let the Canuck's defenseman put him through the boards, let the zamboni drive over him, if it means that somehow, some way, this won’t end badly.
____________________________________________________


“I’m going to be sick.”

Tabby reaches out to press the flat of her hand to the cool concrete wall and leans over, shutting her eyes against the wave of nausea that engulfs her as they near the end of the corridor. She’d like to believe that it’s the funk coming from the dressing room but she knows it’s not. She can smell the ice and she can hear the sound of skates gliding through the frozen playing surface, pucks ricocheting off the boards and the glass and that means that he is only steps away.

“You don’t have to do this,” Kevin’s hands settle comfortingly on her shoulders and she feels his thick fingers digging into her shoulder blades. “Someone else can tell him, preferably while I have him in a headlock,” he adds with a mocking tone that’s half joking and half not. He’d do it, no questions asked. All she has to do is nod her head. They’ve gotten to be good friends, he and his wife, even in this short time. He's protective. It's his paternal instincts.

“No,” she straightens and waits for the momentary dizziness of her sudden movement to pass. “I have to do this.” Taking a deep breath, she asks her legs to go forward even though they feel like they’re going to give way beneath her. She wishes she could hold Kevin’s hand, as if she were a little girl. It would be comforting but ‘lily livered’ as her grandfather would say.

Stepping out into the box the cold air makes her draw in a ragged breath, or maybe it’s the black practice uniforms of the skaters out on the ice that says they are different, other. They are not the blue and green and white practice uniforms of the Canucks. That’s not to say she was used to Kevin’s uniform, it just meant that he was out there.

She can feel him, like the tug on the other end of a fishing line. She knows, even beneath the bulky uniform, the helmet and pads, she knows it’s him the moment her gaze settles on his back. She doesn’t need to see the small ‘87’ on the back of his helmet.

She grips the top of the half boards, feeling the meeting of wood and plastic under her hands as he turns, as his gaze meets hers’. She hears herself gasp and her hand goes to her swollen midsection. It’s like she’s been kicked, but from which side?
He puts his head down and slowly, too slowly, begins to skate towards her. It’s like watching him move in slow motion, like watching skate through knee deep water. She’s had time to watch almost every video on youtube and she knows he can skate quicker than he is. Does it mean he’s as reluctant for this reunion as she is?

Her nails dig into the boards and she wills herself to stand there and wait. Say nothing. Just breathe. That, in and of itself, is made more difficult by her racing pulse. With every gliding step he takes, her heart beat quickens until it seems like all she can hear is the rush of her own blood in her veins and the frantic hammering of her heart.

When he gets within a few feet of the bench he raises his eyes and she feels the ice she’s surrounded her heart with melt away. He actually looks as vulnerable and scared as she feels.

‘Don’t forget the bomb you’re about to lay on him’, she reminds herself. She knows the look on his face might…no, will change the moment she tells him. ‘He’s got everything, the whole world at his feet. He doesn’t need this. He’s going to hate this,’ she tells herself. It’s sort of like telling herself not to get her hopes up...or exactly like it.

“Tabby.”

His saying her name tastes like dark chocolate sauce over fudge ripple ice cream. She opens her mouth but the name that springs to her lips is ‘Patrick’ and she catches it just in time, and shakes her head and smiles sardonically. Instead she stays silent until he reaches the boards and they find themselves staring shyly at one another like two strangers, or not quite.

“We should talk,” she says quietly, the words she’s rehearsed in her head coming out almost too quiet but she knows he’s heard her as his gaze searches hers’. He wants to know what it means but not here. She won’t say anything to him here in front of his teammates. “Is it okay if we…,” she lets her voice trail off as she glances over her shoulder to find OB and Eddy and Ehrhoff watching her intently, ready to spring to her defense if needed. She smiles and shakes her head and does her best to look confident even though she feels far from it.
___________________________________________________________


He manages to open the gate even though his hands are shaking. That’s why he doesn’t take off his gloves, he’s hoping no one will notice if he leaves them on. He can feel everyone watching him and it should be something he’s used to but this feels more like ‘dead man walking’, like he’s being lead to the gallows.

It can’t be good, he thinks to himself as she turns and heads down the narrow, dim corridor, following her retreating form. She could barely manage a smile for him. ‘Well what did you expect?’ he shakes his head at his own naivety. Had he really expected some scene out of some stupid romantic movie with them running into each other’s arms?

‘Just ask her what it’s all about’, he tells himself firmly, ‘get it over with and get back on the ice.’ Sure he’d wanted to see her but if this was all going to go pear shaped….

She turns into one of those rooms the trainer’s used, with an examination table and as she turns to face him, he finds himself speechless. Sure he’d seen her but not really. He hadn’t registered how her hair is now streaked with some colour, is it dark red? Purple? Both? Or that her milk chocolate eyes are rimmed with kohl or that her full lips are stained blood red. He licks his lips. He wants to kiss her.

She’s paler now, but this is Vancouver. It rains here all the time doesn’t it? Maybe it’s the black dress she’s wearing, he thinks and then he thinks it covers too much of her. He can’t help but want to undress her in his mind but he doesn’t want her to see that he’s doing it. He tries to find something else to look at but as soon as he looks down she’s suddenly there, reaching for his hand.

He stares down at her outstretched hand like he expects it to burn him and her eyes go wide. Their hands pause there, mid air, fingertips almost touching but not.

“You left,” he hears his own voice accusing her and he wishes he could take it back.

“You left first,” she says quietly.

“I went back,” he insists. “You were gone.”

“You practically called me a whore,” she whispers back, and withdraws her hand, backing slowly away from him. He can’t stop looking at her. She’s so damn beautiful. He doesn’t want to fight. So why am I? he asks himself. “ I…I didn’t come to fight,” she whispers and he can’t help thinking ‘thank god’ and then he finds himself reaching out for her and now she’s looking at his hands like she expects him to do something to hurt her. He looks down at his stick and smiles. How can he blame her when he’s got a weapon in his hand? He leans the stick against the wall and moves again toward her but she holds her hand out, like a ward. “You…there’s something you should know,” she says quietly and, as he watches, she smoothes her dress over her belly, only it’s not…it’s not the small, feminine sort of swell but it suddenly looks like she’s hiding a rugby ball under there.

He stares at the bulge she seems to be holding between her hands up for a long time before he looks up and meets her gaze. Her dark eyes are welling over with silver tears. He opens his mouth but no words come out. He feels numb. He’s not sure what he should feel. There’s a voice in the back of his head, more like a warning siren, telling him that this is exactly what Troy has warned him about, saying it’s a trap and to deny it and yet….

His hands reach out and though he can see a flicker of fear in her gaze she doesn’t flinch as his hands slide over hers, cradling her stomach until they’re standing close, his body alongside hers’, close enough that he can taste orange juice on her breath.

“I’m here,” he says out loud, as if he’s made a decision he’s not fully aware of making. She turns her gaze up to meet his and all he can see is her full, red, mouth and in the next moment he’s kissing her, her lips moving and parting beneath his.

Chapter 20

This is a little short but I think the next chapter should make up for it!

“Don’t you think you should tell the poor bastard that he’s gonna have a kid?”
Leave it to her younger brother to put it that way, Tabby thought as she narrowed her eyes and wrinkled her nose up at him across the table. Had they been ten years younger, she would have flipped the spoonful of potatoes she was about to put on her plate directly into his face, but instead she put the spoonful of potatoes down on her plate and gave him the stink eye.

“Why should she?” Trina rose to her defense, like a good friend should and Tabby gave her a grateful smile. “The guy lied like a fucking rug about who he is…was…whatever.”

“Because, if I dropped some illegitimate bastard poop maker, I guess I’d want to know,” Darrel continued and that made everyone around the table laugh.

“No you would not,” Tabby insisted, putting up her hand defensively in front of her mouth in case she spewed corn at him while she laughed. “If some poor girl came to this door right now with a bundle of joy with brown hair and brown eyes that looked just like you you’d tell her to fuck off.” Her brother was proud of his man whoring ways and what Tabby was finding surprising was that his first reaction to her news over Thanksgiving dinner was not to want to track the guy down and put his fist in his mouth.

“Yeah well,” her brother’s face turned pink and he laughed uncomfortably, causing Tabby to stare across the table at her mother with the question clear in her eyes. Had that already happened?

“Darrel’s bark is a lot bigger than his bite,” her father answered, handing the bowl of cranberry sauce towards his errant son with a look of pride on his face. Why was it, Tabby wondered, that men thought it was okay to act like a horny alley cat as long as you had a penis attached to you?

“All I’m sayin’ is the dude has a right to know,” Darrel reiterated, earning him a dirty look from Trina which made him smile his evil little brother smile.

“And if he lied to me about something as simple as who he is, what he does…that’s who you think should be in your nephew’s life? Guiding him? Being his example?” Tabby asked, leveling her gaze at him across the table. The turkey leg he had been lifting to his mouth stayed half way there as he found himself caught in the web that Tabby had woven. It was one thing, all this bro’s before ho’s bullshit, but it was quite another thing to protect your own.

“Nice,” Trina held her hand up for a high five but Tabby didn’t reciprocate. This wasn’t about winning or losing. She’d been staring at his number all day on her new phone, the one she couldn’t really afford, and she couldn’t make a decision. Did he deserve to know, even if he hadn’t bothered to chase after her, if when he’d said he’d loved her, his words had obviously been hollow? She was struggling with the decision and in telling her family, she hoped that they would tell her what the right thing to do was.

“He should at least have to pay something towards the sprog’s care,” her father finally replied, chewing thoughtfully on his brussel-sprouts and giving her that look that said she knew she needed it and this was not the time for pride to override good sense. Of course she knew it and he had seemed to have some money behind him, considering what he was driving and the clothes he wore, and she didn’t really want to be bringing up a child in a damp, drafty, cramped apartment. And yet….

“But then he gets some rights to the kid,” Trina pointed out as she had been doing with Tabby since they had found out about the pregnancy. “Then he can take the kid who knows where and, if he does have money, he could even sue for custody and she’d lose.” Tabby nearly choked on her steamed carrots and Trina reached over to curl her hand around her friend’s. “Sorry babe, but it’s true. The biological mother doesn’t win all the time anymore.”

“If he’s the kind of jerk who lies about his name and shit, he’s not gonna want anything to do with the kid,” Darrel gave his sister one of those ‘all for one and one for all’ looks across the table and Tabby managed a weak smile in return. “Fuck him. You don’t need him. We’ll make sure the kid doesn’t go without,” he added, puffing up his chest, just like he had when he was five years old and some of the bigger kids had been picking on her about her braces. He’d stood his ground in front of her and made it known he’d take on anyone who picked on his big sister. He could be a jerk sometimes but Tabby loved him with all her heart.

“He’s right, for once,” Tabby’s mother leaned over and patted her daughter’s hand. “And I’ll make a call to Uncle Dave, see if we can’t get something done about that house,” she added to which Tabby bristled.

“I was thinking…I mean I know that it would be crazy to be away from all of you, but I own it and…maybe I should move back there.” Every set of eyes stared at her and she shrugged. “It’s just a thought.”

“We’ll get the house sold,” her mother reiterated, “and then you won’t have to worry so much over money.” The pat that she gave Tabby’s hand then made it seem like it was over, there was nothing more to talk about. That was that and suddenly she felt like things were going to be taken out of her hands and the idea of moving back to that rickety old house with its’ creaks and groans and leaking roof didn’t seem like such a bad idea after all.

_____________________________________________________________


“Yes, I had thought of that.” Sidney rubbed at the bridge of his nose, which, along with just about everything else in his head, was beginning to throb. He was beginning to question the references of the private detective that he was sitting across from. He was still having a hard time imagining this guy getting information on hockey players and their agents that Shero could use to entice them to the steel town. “The estate agent referred me to her Uncle, who, I’m pretty sure, was the one who talked her into selling up and leaving in the first place,” he added, grimacing at the short, very impersonal discussion he’d had with dear old Uncle Dave who had been even less helpful than the ladies at Harlequin. “And she doesn’t twitter or facebook or myspace or any of that stuff…at least as far as I can tell,” Sidney added with a sigh.

“And you’ve checked her friend’s networks?” the man asked, noting something in the little black book he carries with him.

“No…I mean…I never got to meet any of her friends and she didn’t really talk enough about them for me to know where to start,” Sidney admits, that heavy feeling in his stomach beginning to make him feel like maybe this was a really bad idea.

“It’s not a lot to go on,” the dick admits, tapping his pen on the paper in front of him before looking across the desk to where Sid feels like squirming. The guy knows who he is and he’s already handed a wad of cash over to him; five hundred a day, plus expenses. It’s kind of like a guy having you by the jockstrap, it’s uncomfortable and embarrassing and there isn’t a damn thing you can do about it without making it worse. “You have thought that maybe she doesn’t want you to find her?” the man asks in that slow, straightforward tone that says a lot about what he thinks of Sid’s lack of game. Sid nods, dropping his gaze because it’s hard to have another grown man looking at you like it’s almost funny for a young guy with all the money in the world not to be able to get the woman he wants, like the guy’s enjoying that idea just a little too much. “There are stalker laws…,” the guy begins and Sidney finds his fingers itching to grab the folded bills back, stuff them in his wallet and leave.

“Look…I…I fucked up with her okay? I just want the chance to…,” to fuck her again, to have her in his bed and make her scream his name, “to apologize, if nothing else.” There, he’s said it and the guy gives a slow, deliberate nod as if to say that he can understand that. It’s the best play that he can make. Everyone thinks of him as that good, polite kid and he knows damn well that everyone will buy a story like that. That he just wants to make amends and sure that’s a part of it, but only a part.

“And you’re sure she’s in Vancouver?” the guy makes another note in his book while Sid nods and then the guy snaps his little book shut. “Okay, well, I’ll make some inquiries but I can’t promise anything. I’ll be in touch with you as soon as I know anything.” The man pushes his chair back with a loud scraping sound and Sid takes that as a signal to do the same. He stretches his hand out and Sid finds himself looking into a pair of grey eyes and he can’t help but notice the lack of sincerity in them.

This was a bad idea, he tells himself again as he shakes the man’s hand. It might be a bad idea, the devil on his other shoulder tells him, but what other plays have you got to make hot shot? The game in Vancouver is in three weeks and he knows that will be his best shot and he’ll only have a few hours to try and convince her that he’s not really the biggest asshole in the world.

“I know finding her isn’t a guarantee she’ll see me,” he says quietly, his hand on the doorknob, “but I have to find her, please.” He looks back at the detective who is already moving to go back to his computer. Somewhere in his mind Sid knows that finding her on the world wide web is probably the fastest, easiest way but he can’t help wishing that the guy would pull out a fedora and go charging out into the street to do it the old fashioned way.

“I’ll do my best,” the man with the cool grey stare nods in a dismissive way and Sid slunk back out the door he’d come in and down the dimly lit hall and he couldn’t help feeling as pathetic as Max had told him it was to do this. But then Max hadn’t held her in his arms, hadn’t heard her call out his name.

Would she be flattered, or horrified that he would go to these kinds of lengths to see her again? Either way it was done now, and couldn’t be undone. It was kind of like shaking your gloves off in front of someone you know can and probably will kick your ass. You know it’s going to hurt but sometimes you just have to do it, he told himself as he made his way back out onto the street where Max and Kris were waiting and he deliberately didn’t meet their curious gazes. They could mock him all they wanted, but when he had her back, he’d be the one laughing.

_____________________________________________________________


“Stop dragging your feet momma,” Trina reached back to grab a hold of Tabby’s wrist as they trudged towards the front doors of the big box electronics store.

“I don’t want you buying things for me,” Tabby moaned, eyeing a sizeable puddle near the door and wondering again what the weather would be like back in Nova Scotia. Much the same, or so her Uncle had told her, when she’d phoned to casually inquire about the house the other night.

“So pay me back when you sell another piece,” her friend insisted, giving her a shove through the doors and past the new dvd releases. Tabby gazed longingly at the stack of movies she couldn’t afford and then obligingly followed her taller, leaner friend down the aisle towards the back of the store where they kept the more expensive, high ticket items.

Like fourty-seven inch high def LCD TV’s. Tabby sighed as Trina paused to get her bearings, and stared at all of the thin flat screens that were so much better than the twenty inch tube set she had at home that now looked positively ancient in comparison. Tabby stood in the middle of the store, surrounded by what seemed like a hundred different sizes of television sets and stared.

“Does anyone have a remote? Can someone turn up the sound?” she asked, turning and looking at one of the bigger screens, her fingers itching to reach out and run her fingers over the planes of his face, to wipe away the droplets of sweat from his upper lip, to trace the line of a new scar that bisected the bridge of his nose.

“Tabs, we’re here to get a microwave so that you can heat up baby bottles, not look at shit you so cannot afford with another mouth to feed on the way,” Trina reminded her, tugging at her arm, trying to lead her away but Tabby felt as if her feet were cemented to the spot. No, worse than that, that she was stuck in quick sand and sinking fast.

“That’s him,” she whispered, her voice almost a sigh as she stared at him in full HD. Spots and all, he was just as beautiful as she remembered.

“That’s who?” Trina asked, having given up on tearing Tabby away from the spot she was obviously unwilling to leave. “That’s Sidney Crosby,” she added, answering her own question. “Yeah, I guess he’s cute. I’m more into the dirty Frenchmen on the team and…,” Trina’s voice dropped off as she turned and stared intently at her friend. “He’s…Tabitha King, are you telling me that that,” she pointed at his likeness on the screen just as he smiled widely, making Tabby’s knees go weak, “that is your baby daddy?” Trina added, pitching her voice even lower than a whisper. Tabby nodded without tearing her gaze away from the screen. “Wait, are you actually trying to tell me that the guy you haven’t been able to stop talking about…the guy that you had sex with all summer…is Sidney fucking Crosby?”

“I guess…no…I mean he said his name was Patrick,” Tabby finally turned to her friend, her face a mask of confusion. “Who is this…who is Sidney Crosby?”

“Oh my god…have you been living in a barn or something?” Trina stared at her, disbelief written clearly all over her face. When Tabby continued to stare blankly back at her Trina finally relented and rolled her eyes. “Oh c’mon, the Olympics were even here for crying out loud. He’s like the golden boy for the entire country! What were you like the only person in the entire city not watching the Gold Medal hockey game?”

“Damon and I went to Cuba during the Olympics…you know I don’t watch sports,” Tabby complained, turning back to watch him run a towel over his dark, curly hair. “So his name is…Sidney?” she tried the name out, letting it roll over her tongue. She’d always like the name Patrick and it certainly sounded stronger, more masculine, than Sidney, and yet, she thought, maybe it suited him. “So he plays hockey…here?” she asked, thinking of the arena down at the end of the Georgia Viaduct and wondering how she could have missed seeing him at the couple of practices she’d been at.

“No…no he plays for Pittsburgh,” Trina shook her head impatiently at her friend and pointed at the logo on the front of his black and gold jersey. Tabby nodded silently, the pieces of the puzzle falling into place.

“I mean…I knew he lied to me…I mean, when I tried to track him down through Gatorade and they were like ‘we don’t have a Patrick that works for us in Halifax but…,” she fell silent as the Trina finally got a hold of the remote and turned up the sound. The small hairs on her arms stood on end as she heard his voice, that almost boyish, half hoarse, half adolescent hormone driven cracking voice of his.

“Well…the stuff he told you was half true,” Trina began her gaze also on the large screen in front of them. Tabby glanced at her, her eyes narrowed and Trina didn’t even have to look over to know that she was waiting for an explanation. “Well, Sidney Patrick Crosby, for one,” Trina began, counting off on her fingers, “and he is a spokesperson for Gatorade and RBK, so that’s two,” she continued, springing another finger from her fist. “And he is from Cole Harbor, born and bred, he just lives in Pittsburgh during the hockey season,” she added, sticking her thumb out to make three. “So…yeah he lied but he wasn’t far off.” Tabby blinked at her friend’s fingers and then turned back to stare at the screen. He was laughing which made that scar on his cheek look almost like a dimple and his caramel coloured eyes to narrow and it made her guts hurt. Her hands automatically spread protectively over her stomach and she suddenly felt very light headed. “They’re playing here in a couple weeks,” Trina added quietly, moving in behind Tabby, ready to catch her if she fainted.

“Here?” Tabby repeated weakly as Trina nodded. “Here,” she repeated to herself, wondering at the way her stomach lurched at the idea. Was that excitement or fear? Did it mean she had to tell him?

The interview was over and, running a towel over his dark, wavy hair, he had turned around and Tabby watched him walk down the corridor in his black and gold uniform, teetering comfortably on his skates. She felt an ache in chest. Her mouth was dry.
She reached for her phone and searched for a number before hitting the start button. She waited, holding her breath until she heard the voice on the other end of the line.

“Katie…, it’s Tabitha. I have a huge favor to ask.”

Chapter 18

“But…do you know who I am?”

It was a last resort and one Sidney hated to use. Unless it was for charity, he hardly ever tossed his name and reputation into the ring but this was the third person he’d been passed on to and he could clearly hear in this woman’s voice that he had hit the end of the road.

“All I can tell you, sir, is that while I do know of a Tabitha King, she is not an employee of Harlequin as such and even if she was, we have a strict policy against giving out personal information of any kind to anyone, no matter who he might be,” she added in that sort of tone that a librarian might use to shush rowdy kids during study hall. Sidney paced the hallway, trying to come up with yet another argument that might get this woman to give him just enough information to go on but he was coming up empty.

“Look, I just need to know where I can get a hold of her about…about a painting,” he stammered, thinking of the one that had arrived on his mother’s doorstep that she had thought he had bought for her. “I just wanted to get a payment to her,” he added, hoping that his agent was right when he said everyone had a price.

“If you would like to send a payment, I’d be happy to accept that on her behalf,” the woman said, her tone saying that she was just about out of patience for this game and Sidney knew the clock was ticking. It was like sitting in the sin bin, watching the seconds tick away, waiting for the official to open the door so he could hit the ice. Only this time he knew he’d be hitting a brick wall.

“Give me that.”

Sidney felt his blackberry being pulled out of his hand and found himself staring at Max as he grinned into the phone with his best ‘guest coming to dinner’ fake smile.

“Hello Madame? I am Pat Brisson, Sidney Crosby’s agent and what my client has been pussy-footing around is the small matter of likeness being used on a number of covers of your product,” Max held a single finger up towards Sid when he opened his mouth to protest. The last thing he wanted was Tabitha getting into trouble over that or getting Pat or the league involved. That would just turn into a colossal cluster fuck. “Yes Madame, I’m sure that you didn’t realize or you would have been in touch with me before now….No, I can assure you we will not be looking for compensation, at this time,” Max added with a wink as Sidney shook his head and gave him his best ‘I am so going to fucking kill you’ glare. “My client merely wishes to get in contact with the artist again about a painting that was unfinished when last they were in touch. It was for a…,” Max tilted his head to one side and got that look on his face that made Sidney shake his head. “It was for a…charity auction and my client is most anxious that he be in receipt of the work on time….Yes, it was a sort of friendly exchange. You could say that.” Max could hardly contain himself, he had to cover his mouth to stop from laughing and Sidney raised a clench hand in warning. “Yes well, if you can have her call my client back at this number, it is most urgent that he hear from her…oui Madame, no thank you,” he added with a flourish handing Sidney’s phone back to him with a gleeful sort of grin. “Well if that doesn’t do it, mon ami, then I don’t know what to say,” Max added triumphantly.

“If she gets into trouble,” Sidney warned, his teeth grinding together as he stared his friend down.

“Mon capitaine, tu inquiétes beaucoup trop,” Max grinned, reaching out to pat Sidney on the shoulder. “Do you want to see your beautiful artiste again?” he added, reaching up to cup Sidney’s cheek before giving it a firm pat. “Then trust ton Oncle Max.”

“I wouldn’t trust ton Oncle Max as far as I could throw him, which, if he keeps chowing down on poutine before the games is not fucking far at all,” Jordy tossed his two cents in as he walked by in nothing but a towel, reaching out to pat Max’s stomach as he went by. Max let out a howl of protest and set out after the tall blonde forward, grabbing his towel and yanking it off but missing the forward himself.

Sidney watched them go and stared down at his phone and wondered if Max’s ploy would work. He certainly hoped so. He had finally given in last night, sitting alone on his bed at Mario’s, and he’d called her number, only to find that it was no longer in service.

Had she done it because of him? Or was she that in need of money?

He’d checked with Taylor and she’d confirmed with a drive by that the big house was still for sale. He knew Tabby had put a lot of her own money into the work they’d done on the house and he felt even guiltier about how everything had turned out.

Mostly he missed her, even more lately now that he was spending his nights alone, staring at the ceiling. She was on his mind all of the time, it seemed.

He stared at the phone and silently willed it to vibrate in his hand.

“Coming?” Coach Dan emerged from his office in his wind suit, whistle around his neck, stick in hand. Sidney nodded his head and turned to follow his coach out to the ice. Working out helped, and maybe if he worked hard enough he could forget the empty spot that he could feel deep in his chest; at least for a little while.
________________________________________________________


“Shit.”

Tabby stared at the blue and white stick in her hand and felt tears welling up in her eyes.

“Shit,” she said again as she reached for the box with her free hand and pulled out the instructions again. Not that she needed to read them again. Mel had forced her to buy the digital one that would read pregnant or not pregnant. She knew exactly what she was looking at and the only thing that would come out of her mouth was, “shit.”

“How you doin’ in there babes?” Trina, one of her friends from school had also stuck around, ‘for moral support’ and Tabby knew she should be glad to know that her friends were there for her, but with her panties around her ankles, her ass still hanging over the cold bowl and a damned stick in her hand telling her that her future was shot, it was a little difficult to conjure any kind of warm fuzzy feeling.

“You should have a read out by now,” Mel knocked on the door and Tabby put the stick down gently on top of the box before struggling to pull up her panties, flush the toilet and pull down her skirt before she turned on the tap and ran the water until it got good and cold. She wasn’t sure if it was an old wives tale, but she stuck her wrists under the cold water and then pressed them to her forehead and the sensation of vertigo seemed to subside, for now anyway.

“Babes?” Trina was at the door now too and she could see their concerned faces in her mind. They were the ones that had put two and two together before she did, the nausea, the sudden sensitivity to certain smells and the overwhelming need to eat doughnuts of every size, shape and colour. How she’d managed to overlook that she’d missed her period all this time and then there was the fact that her tits just plain hurt….

Tabby counted back on her fingertips. Not that she should really need to. She knew when the last time she’d had sex was. No one needed to remind her of that. What she couldn’t remember was exactly when she started missing periods, what with the stress of moving and then setting up the show and deadlines for Illustrations and….

“Tabs! Seriously! Get your fucking ass out here and tell us what it says!” That was Trina, about as patient as a three year old outside a candy store.

“You know what it says,” she mumbled, half to herself as she opened the door and pressed the stick into Mel’s waiting hands. She didn’t wait for her reaction. In fact, she purposefully walked away from her to give her friend time to school her features. She knew Mel would be grinning like the fucking Cheshire Cat behind her until she realized that Tabby wasn’t skipping and clapping like a demented cheerleader.

Trina, on the other hand, had slumped into a chair, her long legs over the arm, fanning herself like she was the one finding out that she had a bun in the oven. Tabby stopped at the fridge and admired her friend’s self possession. She couldn’t afford that kind of emotional self indulgence. Well, not anymore anyway.

“What are you going to do?” Tabby turned to see Mel doing her damndest to keep her expression neutral, but she could see the glint in her dark eyes.

“Oh c’mon you both know damn well what I’m going to do,” she sighed as she yanked the fridge door open and reached for the Nanaimo bars her mother had sent home with her the other night. The sugary, chocolaty pieces of heaven that she’d been avoiding as she’d told herself that she had to get back into her skinny jeans. Well there was no fucking chance of that now, she mused as she pulled the whole tray out and cut herself a piece about as big as five dollar bill and slid it onto a plate, licking her fingers as she turned back to face her friends who were both staring at her, waiting. “What? Oh c’mon. You know if it was either of you, or anyone we know, I’d be supportive either way; your body, your choice. But this is me and I’m just not flushing anything down the drain just because I was stupid,” she sighed and then smiled down at the chocolate topped treat on her plate. She lifted the bar to her mouth and bit off a large piece, grinning around it as she chewed happily, rolling the ultra sweet, smooth filling around her tongue.

“So I’m gonna be an Aunty?” Mel gazed down at the stick and then up at Tabby like a kid expecting her favorite toy to be snatched away by the mean older sister. Tabby laughed and nodded, her mouth too full to answer out loud. Mel let out a little squeal and started bouncing up and down while Trina rolled her dark eyes and let out a dramatic sigh.

“Oh don’t be like that Trins. You can be the Aunty that buys the kid its’ first dimebag, helps it sneak out of the house, covers for it when it doesn’t make it by curfew, teaches it how to make shit mix…,” Tabby paused as the sugary sweetness in her mouth suddenly seemed to sour. “Oh Christ…I’m gonna be a momma.”

“You’ll be a great mom,” Mel gushed, putting the stick aside and coming around the island to put her arms around Tabby and after a minute Tabby felt Trina join in the hug.

“Yeah, and if you suck, we’ll be here to help, I guess,” Trina added, her enthusiasm, or lack thereof, making Tabby smile. “But before you ask, I don’t do diapers.”

“I would never presume,” Tabby sighed, reaching around to give Trina a squeeze, which left Mel as the cuddly filling in the sandwich.

“We’ll buy a diaper Jeanie and a monitor and….”

“Whoa there sunshine,” Tabby unwound both of her friends from her and went back to the fridge to look for some milk, to cut the sweetness of the bar. “I’m a single mom, and a fucking art student at that. I have a bad feeling we’ll be washing out cloth diapers. Have you ever seen the price of pampers?”

“Oh well then you can definitely forget about me helping,” Trina made a face like she was actually facing a dirty diaper, waving her hand in front of her face and gagging. “God, can’t the guy you knocked you up help out a little? I mean, I assume there were two of you in on this decision not to use protection, genius.”

“I’m pretty sure he doesn’t exist,” Tabby sighed as she poured the cold milk into a tall glass, “or at least the version of him he told me about,” she added as she took the glass and the plate out into what worked as the living room in her tiny apartment, which was a bean bag chair, a worn black suede love seat that dipped in the middle, and a very old wingback chair, which she loved and settled into now. “Did I tell you that I called just about every marketing company that advertises that it does work with sports and not one of them had a Patrick Lemieux working for them? I mean…so if he lied about that, what else did he lie to me about?”

“You could call him,” Mel pointed out, glancing quickly at Tabby’s phone that was sitting out on the coffee table beside her purse. “You did say you had his number.”

“Yeah, I could, if I hadn’t shut it off last month,” Tabby moaned, closing her eyes. “And before you say it, yes I know I could just turn it on and get his number and call from your phone but honestly…he lives, well I don’t fucking know where the asshole lives but I don’t need him. We don’t need him,” she added, her hand going protectively to her stomach and then all three of them looked at one another and there was not a single dry eye in the room.
_____________________________________________________________________


“Mario…,” Sid growled as his land lord and mentor gave him a little shove in the direction of the cute blonde that had sung the national anthem at the game. “It was Max that said she was cute,” he argued but Mario’s width and height stopped him from turning around and going back, and besides, now she was watching him expectantly. She was wearing too much make up and he could tell from this far away that she had extensions. Another fake Hollywood wannabe.

“Just be nice,” Mario insisted, his big fingers digging into his shoulder as he ‘guided’ him in the direction he wanted him to go. “Nathalie and I are worried about the way you’ve been moping around lately,” his mentor added, sounding just like most of the guys on the team. They didn’t like him whoring around, they didn’t like him staying home…what the hell did these people want?

“Sidney, this is Delta Goodrem,” Shero gave Sidney that look that there was no other way to interpret. It was the kind of look he’d gotten used to when people wanted him to take their daughter or their niece out. It said, be nice, show here a good time, but be a gentleman. As if there was any other way he was going to be. He put his hand out and watched her place her small hand in his. She seemed fragile, tiny.

“Hi,” he said and watched as she blushed and batted her eyelashes. Jesus, did girls really think that worked? It made him think of the first time he’d met Tabby and she’d turned him into the stammering, bumbling idiot.

“It’s nice to meet you,” she whispered it, like she could barely speak in his presence, but she reached out with her other hand and pawed at his arm while she looked up at him through her fake eyelashes. Did women come out of the womb knowing how to flirt like this? Fortunately he seemed immune to this kind of thing. Jordy, or Max on the other hand….

“So have you been to Pittsburgh before?” he asked, steering her away from the prying eyes of the owner and general manager. He’d talk to her for a while, be nice but there was no way in hell he could be interested in this…cookie cutter blonde.
He’d had Burgundy from the Loire Valley in France, he had a hard time imagining himself going back to the kind of wine that came in a box.

_______________________________________________________


“More, really?” Katie scooped up Tabby’s plate and, blushing like she’d just won Miss America, got up to get her seconds. Normally, and especially in front of Kevin’s friends, Tabby would never even finish her food, not that Katie wasn’t a good cook, it was just between laughing and talking, usually her food would get cold and they’d move into the living room and it would be forgotten. But then, that was before Tabby suddenly found just about everything not only edible, but fucking delicious.

“What about some wine?” Shane lifted the bottle again but Tabby shook her head and covered the glass with her hand.

“Nice try OB, stop trying to get my guest drunk,” Kevin laughed, handing his own plate over his shoulder to his wife. Tabby’s eyes followed the plates, hoping there was enough turkey tetrazzini for all of them.

“Well she wouldn’t let me walk her home last time,” Shane complained, grinning that boyish grin of his across the table at her and Tabby managed, just, to tear her attention away from Katie and the pot of food long enough to blow the big freckle faced defenseman a raspberry.

“You’d have to try Tequila and lots of it before I let you take me home O’Brien,” she teased, narrowing her eyes at him and pursing her lips. He laughed, but then he seemed to laugh at almost everything. “I know where you’ve been and I don’t want to catch where you’ve been,” she added, making the entire table groan. Tabby winked at him, to let him know that she didn’t really mean it, although she sort of did. Shane liked to party and when he partied he partied until the beer goggles were well and truly fused to his head and there were pictures on the internet to prove it.

“If you need a ride home,” a voice whispered in her ear as the clunk of ice cubes falling into her glass made her turn her head. “I would be happy to oblige.” Tabby glanced sideways at the very tall, very blonde young defenseman that everyone called Eddie and she let herself really smile for once. The Bieksa’s had invited her to a few of these dinner parties now and she was fairly certain that this was one of the main reasons. They were trying to set her up with the young Swedish defenseman and she had to admit that the idea was growing on her. She opened her mouth to say so when Katie’s arm slid between them and put the plate of carb loaded goodness in front of her and the need to speak sort of…dissipated with the steam and the scent of cream and cheese and turkey.
____________________________________________________________________

“Well this is you,” Sidney said quietly as he pulled up in front of the Marriott. He thought he detected a pout on the thin lips of his ‘date’ but considering it hadn’t even been his idea to take her out for desert, he thought it was very gentlemanly of him not to have just called her a cab.

“Do you want to come up for a…a nightcap? Or we could get something from the bar?” she asked, her eyes a little too wide, practically pleading with him to come inside and screw her brains out and Sidney found that it wasn’t even remotely tempting.

“We leave for a road trip in the morning,” he explained, wishing for her sake that Mario had pawned her off on Max, TK, Jordan, any of his single friends who would have gladly taken her up on her obvious offer and provided her with the kind of night she was obviously looking for. Once again, he knew, she’d be telling all of her friends that he was aloof, at best, rude and obnoxious at worst. Still, he found that he just didn’t care. “I have to be up at five and I’m a real bear when I don’t sleep.” He thought it was a good reason and it wasn’t far off, except that Flower would be picking him up in the Lambo nearer to ten than five.

“This is closer to the airport,” she pointed out, which again was true but now she was really begging and that was just sad. Sidney thought about letting her suck on his dick for a while but then shook his head at his own selfishness. There was only one girl he wanted with her lips around his cock and he was still hoping that she would call, soon.

“It was very nice to meet you. Good luck with your singing,” he added, trying his best to be diplomatic and nice at the same time. She stared daggers at him and then turned with a sort of huffing noise and pushed open the door to the SUV and stomped up the steps of the hotel. Sidney watched her go. It was the least he could do to make sure she made it inside safely. That, or he could call Jordan and let him know that the cute blonde was all alone….

Sidney laughed and reached over to pull the door of the SUV shut and headed for home, leaving his phone safely in his pocket, ready to receive a call at any time.

_________________________________________________________


“Thanks for taking me home.” Tabby sat in the passenger seat holding her purse on her lap like it was a security blanket, but she knew, if he made the move, she was about ready to toss it into the street, Guess or not. She glanced across the car and watched his long, elegant hands as he put the car into park. Her entire body tingled. ‘It’s just because you haven’t been touched in months,’ she told herself firmly. It wasn’t that she was really all that attracted to him. Not that he wasn’t good looking. He definitely had a sort of boyish charm that had something to do with his shy demeanor and his big blue eyes that were looking at her as his arm sort of casually stretched out along the back of her seat.

“I could pick you up, for breakfast,” he began, his Swedish accent lending him a cute sort of lisp that made her want to lean towards him to make sure she was listening to him. Or at least that’s what she told herself as she swayed in his direction. “Or I could just…come up, and we can go for breakfast…together.” She wondered how he did it as his blue gaze searched hers’ as he waited for her answer. He was basically saying let’s fuck while remaining entirely innocent looking. His suggestion had nothing of the smoldering darkness that Patrick had had whenever he looked at her in that certain way that said ‘I’m stripping your clothes off in my mind, right now’.

She wanted it, or at least part of her did. The other part, the sane part, smiled and shook her head.

“Maybe another time,” she promised, leaning forward to press her lips, very briefly against his before opening the door and heading into her apartment, alone.



I can hear it now... but just so you know, this is the direction I was aiming in all along so those of you who think you called it, yes you did but this is where I've been going from the start and for those of you who didn't want this to happen I just ask that you give me & Tabby some time with this

Chapter 14

This is kinda short but I hope kinda hot

When he put his key in the lock, Sidney had a moment’s hesitation. He’d had the key made when he’d updated the locks on her doors from the old, easy to pick, easy to kick in for that matter, to newer deadbolts and sliding bars. Keeping a copy for himself bordered on stalker behavior but he was hoping she would see it more as a protective romantic gesture. Either way, he thought as he stepped into the still darkness of the witching hour, it was too late to go back now.

Edmonton had been a huge waste of time. The crowds hadn’t been nearly what the guys had been lead to believe would show up. Certainly it was nice to be celebrated and it was always good to see some of the guys he would normally only see out on the ice in opposition jerseys but the entire time he’d been itching to get on a plane and get back to her.

As he vaulted the stairs two at a time, Sidney tugged his shirt over his head and hummed to himself. He felt better now, in the middle of the night, than he had in days. He didn’t normally mind doing the kinds of events he’d been involved in over the last few days but this time it had been harder than usual and he’d had to ignore his mother’s phone calls. They were wondering where he was and when he was coming home and if he would be there for dinner.

It wasn’t like him to intentionally ignore them, but even if he’d told them that he was on the red eye, his mother would have expected him for breakfast and there was only one place he wanted to wake up and that was with Tabby in his arms.

As he pushed open the bedroom door, he found Tabby laying in a silvery pool of moonlight, sprawled across the middle of the Queen sized bed, the covers thrown aside. The night was sticky hot and he wasn’t surprised to find her smooth skin bare to his eyes.

He unbuckled his belt and let his shorts slide to the floor, kicked off his shoes and slid onto the bed behind and beside her, sweeping her long, dark hair aside so he could press his lips to the nape of her neck. She sighed in her sleep and snuggled back against him. Emboldened, Sid kissed his way down her back, only stopping when she began to squirm as his lips found the small of her back.

“I missed you,” he whispered, drawing her cool body against his, his lips brushing the shell of her ear before he dropped another kiss onto the round of her shoulder. Her reply was a contented sounding hum and the press of her body back against his and his body began to come alive accordingly. He pressed himself to the small of her back and slid his hand around to cup her breast. He felt her nipple hardening in his palm and felt his heart beat double. Her back arched and she let out a strangled cry as he bit down, his teeth digging into the silvery white flesh of her neck. She whimpered and reached back, her fingers digging into his hair, into his scalp.

She tasted of lavender soap and moonbeams, her skin warmed where he touched it, where it pressed against his. With one of her hands, she led his down, over her stomach and down, down into the valley between her legs. She tried to let go of his hand then, but he kept her fingers in his, guiding her hand to that pearl between her legs that made her draw a ragged breath between her teeth and sent a shudder throughout her entire body, leaving her covered in goose flesh.

Rolling her onto her back, Sidney continued to guide her hand with his own, while his lips surrounded the hard, pink bud of her nipple, drawing it into her mouth until her back arched and she began to whimper. Pressing her hand over the hard nub of her clit, as if to imply that she should continue what she was doing, Sidney slid his hand further down, slipping one finger and then two inside of her hot, wet entrance.

She moaned and pressed against his hand and Sidney looked up to watch her expression transform. He watched her bite down on her bottom lip as he swirled his tongue around her nipple and, at the same time, gently but firmly pressed his fingers inside of her as far as they would go until she raised her hips up off of the bed.

She cried out, her head thrashing from side to side as the orgasm rolled over her. As her body began to relax, Sid lay beside her, watching her intently, his mind buzzing, full of emotions he was trying to rein in. When she opened her dark eyes and turned to smile at him he lost his tenuous hold.

“I love you.”

____________________________________________________________


It was the second best way she could think of to wake up.

Tabby stretched like a contented cat as the orgasm ebbed, leaving her boneless, relaxed and content, ready for the next round. Turning to face the intruder, she opened her eyes and smiled into the hazel ones that were looking down into hers’.

“I love you.”

They were three simple words but as he said them, his hand reaching out to tenderly press her hair back from her sweat slicked cheek, Tabby felt her pulse begin to beat so hard that it almost hurt as her blood roared through her veins. He was staring at her, boyish and expectant, waiting for her to say it back, and all she could think to do was pull his lips down over hers’ so that she couldn’t.

She parted her lips and reached for his tongue with hers and he answered in kind, kissing her hungrily, demandingly, and guilt pricked at her conscience. She was using his obvious state of arousal against him, knowing he’d have to give in to his ‘little head’ if she curved her leg around his just so, if she reached between them and lead his thick, hard cock towards her entrance. She had, however, no delusions that he’d forget that he’d said the words, or that he was still waiting for her to say them.

Or maybe not, she thought desperately. Maybe it was just one of those things you say in the heat of passion and it didn’t really mean anything. Maybe he’d just said it because he thought she wanted to hear it and he was actually relieved that she hadn’t said it back. ‘Yeah right,’ she told herself, biting down on the inside of her cheek as he made a hard thrust that sent her skidding back across the sheets. ‘You saw his face. It’s probably the first time he’s ever said those damn words,’ she thought, guilt gripping at her insides as he drew back to look down at her.

“I missed you too,” she replied, her tongue sweeping out over his ear as his body moved over hers’, thrusting inside of hers’ as deep as he could go. She could pretend that’s what she heard, play dumb, or even use the ‘just woke up’ card if he pressed it. But she couldn’t say it.

Or could she? After all, wasn’t that the reason she was sharing this house with him, that she wasn’t even a little bit surprised that he was here, waking her up in the middle of the night, that she didn’t even question how he got in? ‘Because you trust him you dimwit,’ she grumbled to herself as pulled back again, this time reaching to cradle her face in his hands, that look, that damned hopeful look back on his face, his gaze earnestly searching hers’.

‘Damn it!’ she silently cursed as she looked up into that serious gaze, those boyishly handsome features that had made her weak at the knees from the very first moment. There was something so ludicrously honest about him but at the same time she couldn’t ignore that voice at the back of her head that kept telling her that he was holding out on her, that there was something he wasn’t telling her and how could she give him her heart when she hardly even knew him and yet….

And yet hadn’t she already given it to him, if not in words at least in deed? As her lips and teeth travelled up the underside of his chin, as her teeth dug into the meaty flesh of his bottom lip and she heard him groan, she felt him take it, her heart scratching and digging its way out of her chest, for him.

“I love you,” she whispered against his mouth, his breath warm and tasting faintly of whiskey as it mingled with hers’. His gaze softened, his gold flecked eyes filling with silvery tears and then he roughly captured her mouth and kissed her, hard. She tasted the coppery tang of blood and didn’t care. She kissed him back just as hard, teeth clashing, tongues snaking out to flick against one another as their bodies battled, slamming into each other mercilessly, fingers digging in hard enough to leave marks if not bruises, hip bones meeting, flesh raked and stinging.

Tabby reached back and grabbed hold of the brass headboard, using it as leverage, lifting her hips to meet him thrust for thrust, knowing she was close, so close. All the tenderness had leaked out of his gaze and had been replaced with a fire and a focus that would have been intimidating had she not felt the same determined, almost feral expression forcing her to bare her teeth at him and her eyes to flash what felt like a dare; ‘I dare you to break me’ or ‘I dare you to make me scream’.

Whether he read the look in her eyes or had become so attuned to her body language that he just knew, but with a growl that emanated from deep in his chest, Patrick dug his thick fingers into her waist, pulling her into him, over him, until he was completely sheathed deep within her and then he withdrew, slowly, until only the tip of his cock remained. She stared down the length of him, her juices making his dick glisten in the moonlight, and then he rammed it inside of her with one, quick hard thrust that left her with her mouth open in a silent ‘o’ and her eyes rolled back in her head as her climax took hold. It felt like she’d been plugged into an electrical socket, like she was riding a wave of current, her body bucking and shuddering as though she were being electrocuted. She barely acknowledged his own roar as her body clamped down around his like a vice, as if her pussy was a mouth with teeth threatening to rip his dick off and keep it inside of her, forever. All she could hear was the singing of her own blood in her ears and her voice, screaming his name.

_______________________________________________________


Their bodies bathed in sweat, Sidney gathered her into his arms and curled protectively around her as they both shook in the aftermath of what he was fairly certain was the strongest, most earth shattering orgasm either of them had ever experienced. Tabby was crying softly, her face buried in his chest and Sid was surprised to find tears in his own eyes. He’d never, ever, in his life felt like this and it was unnerving and mind-blowing all at the same time. His heart was racing and it wasn’t just from exertion. It was from admitting his feelings and seeing the look in her eyes when she’d repeated those words back to him….

Sidney had never imagined wanting anything the way he’d wanted the Stanley Cup or the way he’d been almost paralyzed by how much he had wanted the Olympic Gold Medal but in this moment, as he brushed his lips over her forehead, tasting the salt of her sweat on his lips, he knew he wanted her in the same way. He wanted to hold her and never let her go and it shook him to his core to know that he’d given her his heart so easily.

“Tabby cat,” he whispered into her hair, and she purred in response, before nipping at him, biting down gently on his nipple and turning her eyes playfully up to meet his gaze. “You…,” his voice failed him as he cupped her cheek in his hand. “You’re so fucking beautiful,” he whispered, his voice cracking as his chest tightened, his heart constricting around an unfamiliar ball of emotion.

“I bet you say that to all the girls you get in bed with,” she giggled, walking her fingers up his chest, digging in with her fingernails just enough to leave half moon indentations in his skin. He shook his head and started to deny it but the peal of Tabby’s laughter made him pause. She grinned up at him and he couldn’t resist kissing her, long and deep, drinking from her mouth.

“I should have asked you to come with me,” he whispered against her mouth before brushing his lips over the tip of her nose and then onto her eyelids.

“On a business trip? Borrrrinnng,” she mumbled, yawning and rolling over onto her stomach and putting her cheek down on her forearms. “I’m glad you came back though,” she added with a grin.

“Did you think I wouldn’t?” he asked, rolling onto his side and reaching out to run his fingers down her back, tracing the wave of her spine from her shoulders to where it dipped at the small of her back, before he let the flat of his hand run down to cup the swell of her ass.

“I don’t know, I guess it was a possibility,” she replied, hiding another yawn behind her hand.

“No,” he shook his head, sliding closer to her and pressing his lips down onto her bare shoulder, “it wasn’t.” She gave him a playful smile and Sidney felt his body reacting again to that glint in her eye. He slid his hand lower, sliding it down between her thighs where it was wet and warm. She closed her eyes and sighed and settled her thighs farther apart. Kissing his way across her shoulders, Sidney crawled over her, until he was straddling her thighs. With his hands on her hips, he began to nudge at her opening.

She giggled and muttered something sleepily like ‘again?’ but pulled her knees up beneath her and let him settle himself between her thighs. He slid in easily, her pussy wet and relaxed and yet it still took his breath away as he felt her muscles welcoming him in, pulling him deeper. Wrapping his hands around her waist, he began to rock into her, pulling her hips, the cushion of her ass towards him.

He wasn’t going to last and he knew it. He was tired and his head was reeling with all the strange new emotions swimming around in his brain. Reaching forward, he captured one of her breasts in his hand, felt it swing, the soft, smooth skin filling his hand. He squeezed her nipple, stroking it to a hard point, rolling the nub between his fingers until she moaned and he felt her tighten around his shaft.

Dragging a ragged breath through his teeth, he slid his hand back along her ribcage until he found the soft bare mound of her pussy and slid his fingers down, into the warm, moist valley, until he found her clit. He slid his fingers over it and heard her answering gasp, a sound that made him wish he could last longer, tease her, bring her before he climaxed but he could already feel that weight in his balls, could hear the buzzing in his ears that told him there was very little chance of that.

She pressed back against him and whimpered, and Sidney knew that she didn’t want slow, didn’t want gentle, and with a tired smile, he raised his free hand and brought it down on the lily white skin of her ass with a resounding ‘smack’. Her high pitched cry and the ensuing squeeze of her muscles around his dick was just too much. He felt the blackness coming, the little death, and pumped into her as hard and fast as he could, using his thumb and forefinger on her clit in hard, swift little circles that matched his rhythm and hear her begin to pant. At the very least he wanted her to cum with him, wanted to feel those rhythmic little squeezes around his cock, milking him dry.

“Are you close?” he asked, his voice hoarse, having to force it past the wolf like howl waiting to erupt from his throat.

“Yessss,” she hissed, and Sidney raised his free hand again, bringing it down hard on her ass, hard enough to make her yelp but it also made her back arch, her pussy constrict and those little ripples, those little spasms erupt around his cock that told him he could let go. His own back arched and his eyes squeezed shut and he let out a cry that was entirely primal, a wave of pleasure erupting from his balls that went all the way up to the tip of his head.

As soon as the ringing stopped in his ears and he could breathe again, Sidney collapsed onto the bed and once again, Tabby curled into him, backing her ass into his middle. He wrapped his arms around her and felt their heart beats begin to slow together until they were both breathing in that shallow, slow way that says sleep isn’t far off. Leaning in to brush her cheek with his lips, he whispered those words to her again and watched as her full mouth curled up into a contented smile.

“I love you too, Patrick,” she whispered, reaching back to grab at his hand, lacing her fingers in his and pulling his arm around her like a blanket.

Sidney stared into the dark and felt all of the wonderful, crazy, new emotions he’d been feeling ebb away as a lead weight of guilt built in the pit of his stomach. He’d told her he loved her, and he meant every single solitary word, and he’d lied through his teeth at the same time.
He would tell her tomorrow, he promised himself. He’d explain everything and apologize and it would all be okay, he hoped.